Supporting Eating Disorder Recovery during Back to School Season
“How is summer already over?!”
“I hope my teachers are nice!”
“I wonder if my best friend is in my class…”
“I really hope I don’t have a lot of homework or tests.”
Heading back to school can include a mix of reminiscing on how short the summer felt, excitement about a new school year, nerves about new classes and new teachers, and the anticipation of everything that comes with heading back to school. Some kids and families have been counting down the days to head back to school while others wish for just a few more summer days. For children and teens navigating eating disorder recovery, heading back to school brings many additional challenges.
“What if I don’t feel hungry enough for breakfast before the bus comes?”
“What if I can’t finish my lunch in time?
“What if people look at me funny for eating snacks in class?”
“What if people can tell how anxious I am?”
“What if people can tell my body changed?”
For children and teens with an eating disorder, heading back to school can mean schedule and mealtime disruptions, less support, having to explain their eating disorder to others who might not understand, balancing treatment and appointments with school and extracurriculars, and a ton of transitions.
Transitions, Transitions, Transitions
A student with an eating disorder comes to school carrying much more than new pencils and books in their backpack. Doing some preparation and developing a plan before the school year starts can help children, teens, and families feel more equipped and ready to cope with any challenges that arise.
Students with an eating disorder might also be carrying:
Anxiety about new routines
Worries about eating lunch around peers
Body image concerns
Fear of judgement from classmates
Comparison to other students
Perfectionism around grades
Stress about making friends
Trigger #1: A Change in Routines and Meal Times
Back to school seems to come right as families have gotten adjusted to the summer routine, and then all of a sudden things are changing again. Summertime usually means more flexibility in sleep schedules, meal times, responsibilities, and expectations. Once school begins, there is suddenly a 7 am bus to catch, an earlier lunch time, after-school extracurricular activities, homework, and a later dinner that everyone may eat at different times. Students may also deal with questions or pushback from peers and teachers about snack times or frequent appointments. All of this can make consistent nutrition and fueling even harder to maintain.
How to Help:
Practice the school day schedule before school starts.
Identify and plan when and where meals and snacks will happen.
Prepare a plan for unexpected and inevitable changes to the schedule to increase flexibility.
Make sure there are plenty of accessible snack options for during the school day and between extracurriculars.
Create a back up plan for missed or shortened meals.
Trigger #2: The Lunch Room
For many kids, lunchtime is a much-needed break and a time for socializing and connecting with friends. For children and teens with eating disorders, the cafeteria can provoke a lot of anxiety. On top of having less mealtime support, the lunchroom is usually loud, crowded, and overstimulating. There might be a limited amount of time to eat, there may be unfamiliar and nonpreferred foods, and there might be comments from peers about food, bodies, calories, and weight. For a student with an eating disorder, instead of being a break, lunch can turn into the most challenging part of the day.
How to Help:
Identify a supportive adult at the school your student can check in with.
Make sure they have adequate time to eat.
Avoid public attention or comments about the amount they are eating.
Create a supportive eating environment.
Have a plan of what to do if lunch becomes too overwhelming and share the plan with your child’s school.
Communicate with the school and treatment team when additional support is needed.
Trigger #3: Back to School Shopping with a Changing Body
Shopping for clothing can be extremely difficult as a child or teen with a changing body. Adding in eating disorder recovery, body image concerns, changes in body size, or sensory sensitivities can make back to school shopping even harder. Trying on clothes from last year, seeing different sizes on the tags, comparing bodies in the dressing room, or hearing comments about weight and dieting can quickly lead to a spiral.
How to Help:
Choosing clothes that fit the body your child has today. Not the body they had last year or the body someone thinks they “should” have.
Avoiding weight-based compliments. Comments like “You look so thin!” can unintentionally reinforce the idea that smaller is better.
Keeping body talk neutral. Try talking about clothing in terms of comfort, function, and personal style rather than size or appearance.
A Team Approach to Supporting Your Student
One of the most helpful things that families can do to support their child or teen with heading back to school while navigating recovery is to make sure they know who is on their team and that they are not doing this alone. This can include:
Home
Parents, caregivers, and families can help with:
Consistent meals and snacks
Morning and evening routines
Preparing for difficult days
Talking openly about school stress
Support and encouragement when things get hard
School
Schools can provide:
Access to a school counselor, nurse, or other trusted adult
Support with meals
Communication with caregivers
Accommodations when appropriate
A plan for when the student gets overwhelmed
Treatment Team
This can include:
Therapist
Dietitian
Medical provider
Parents, caregivers, family members, and other members of the student’s support system
Build Your Own “Recovery Backpack”
Before school starts consider taking some time with your child or teen to create their own “recovery backpack” to support their recovery and relapse prevention.
Something I can use:
A coping skill, grounding exercise, journal, fidget, or other strategy for when things feel overwhelming.
Something I can say:
A script for asking for help:
“I’m having a hard time right now. Can I talk to you?”
Or
“I need some support around lunch today.”
Someone I can call:
Who is the person they can go to when they need help?
Somewhere I can go:
Is there a counselor’s office, nurse’s office, classroom, or other supportive space where they can take a moment?
Something I want to remember:
Maybe a phrase like:
“One hard day doesn’t mean I have failed.”
Or
“Recovery doesn't have to be perfect.”
Be Ready for When the Day Doesn’t Go As Planned
Having a backup plan for when the day doesn’t go as planned is important because it will probably happen eventually. This could be a snoozed alarm, a rushed or missed meal, a difficult lunch, a comment was made about their body, or the day was just really overwhelming. When unexpected obstacles or changes occur, it is easy to panic and think about the worst-case scenario. But remember, one difficult day does not mean a relapse or setback. It is a normal part of recovery, and approaching it with curiosity can support flexibility and adaptability.
Instead of frustration or panic, try approaching the next day by saying:
“That was a really hard day. What do you think would make tomorrow a little easier?”
You can also support your child by creating a supportive home environment, advocating for their needs, communicating with their school and treatment team, modeling flexibility, maintaining neutral language when talking about food and bodies, reminding them that asking for help is a strength, and that they are not alone.
So This Back to School Season, Remember…
Going back to school can be really hard. There may be difficult transitions, changes to routines, unexpected triggers, and some days may feel much harder than others. It is understandable to want to protect your child from every possible trigger but not only is that almost impossible, but it doesn’t teach them how to navigate triggers. A family’s job is to help your child feel prepared and supported when difficult things do happen and to remind them that recovery doesn’t have to be perfect.
If your child or teen is struggling with an eating, body image, or eating disorder recovery as they head into the new school year, you don’t have to navigate it alone. Reaching out for additional support can be an important part of making the transition feel more manageable for both kids and their families.
